listening to a siren's song of nothing blanket blocking the light that the dams won't flood if I let them to break open the left side of my face already drowned I want to turn onto my right side fully clothed laying in my shoes Tired all the time, unless I'm sleeping I'd say goodbye if I had someone to I want to learn how to stay in tempo too self conscious to read my own lines no mom here to tell me my room's messy Bedsheet white lies, saying I was fine don't have to take showers reply to my moms texts from yesterday waste time eating or sleeping not like I do those things anyway there's one too many people like me on this planet brushing bleeding cavities everyday taking medicine every morning not like I do those things anyway used to waking up exhausted four hours later wishing my nightmares would never stop trying to escape what I'm feeling and thinking don't want anymore feelings or thoughts who cares about if it's sleep or if I'm burning burning my bridges with existance, going under should have got the bottle with the namebrand every source of stress put to eternal slumber

I have no one. I have nothing. I am no one. I am nothing. I have no one. I have nothing. I am no one. I am nothing. I am no one. I am nothing. I am no one. I am nothing. I am nothing. I am nothing. I am nothing. I am nothing.

Used to be six months, for you I weekly change my jeans Sounds like washing hands, water from the sink Don't brush my hair'r, teeth fr'others honey you are the reason I do a few pushups monthly I hope no girls kiss me, lips are chapped and bloody Is she superficial or will she like me cause I'm funny You make my heart vibrate and we'd make a decent team Hope you feel the same as in my nightly dreams. Moved into the same room, parents residence Every night on our Twin liquid evidence Wake at 5 rooted in our phone and sheets Imbibing everyday re-meeting in our sleep Used to change yearly, for you, my boxers every season Faucet on, sounds like I'm washing, you're the reason. Don't wash my clothes or body fr'others, honey you are the reason I lift these dumbbells monthly Can I tell you something important... in a little bit? don't change your mind like every other time waiting for a verb... but all we do is sit it's just that I... nevermind It could just be a freudian... oral fixation I see her biting her lips like she's thinking of mine Tapping feet to a beat... like she's impatient I should have been able to see the hearts in her eyes Pick her up, I'm informed... how dearly I was missed Hanging at home, wish we were there alone Interrupted my goodbye... with a goodbye kiss Maybe a clue the pheremones might be requited No guardians home... a place no one but us could see So we went forward, at least physically Ghost in the Shell... we were each other's three Her feelings for me remain a mystery She asked, how much... um... do you like me? My mind and heart count the ballots for its one party election Melting on her shoes... a bit red and slimy Gathering the strength to ask her a question hey, can I tell you something... in a little bit? what is it, you change your mind every time gathering all my strength to... unzip my sealed lips it's just that I... nevermind Staring at the starry sky always forever was always both of our... wishes That's how I knew she'd... give it a second try we made it to Thanksgiving, next up is... Christmas My friends say her words... mean nothing at all Just cause the timing of when she... said them I saw your love, I saw the paintings... spinning in the hall Heard the same from what you wrote... months ago Didn't need to kiss in public, it's fine... if we have to hide it We knew each other, hearts hidden behind your... eyelids It's cute how you keep all... of your feelings private Learned to hear her words in... silence No replies from her, is something wrong with her number or her phone? With her new friend she passed right by me, and me alone I'm not stupid, you'll try to lie... to yourself to free me But can I go with you if you leave me? (At my party feeling lonely with my girlfriend Just take a nap until I turn twenty I'm sorry for trapping you I'm so sorry I'm stupid for thinking we could be fo-e-rever I'm so sorry for trapping you I don't want you to leave me But I'll completely understand) transparent bandaids over vessels of red wine eternal covenants you only meant for a short time Don't let my wounds heal not feeling very real We should just love each other like we're not made of steel. Can't take showers anymore remind me too much of our dates I weigh a hundred pounds I'll lose a hundred more at this current rate. I'm almost enough even if my attempts used to just fall flat I'm seven out of ten,,, you know it can't get any much better than that. You were my wish, one that didn't come true You didn't get that I loved you, like, I fucking lo waiting for interest before they retract the girls that loved me, didn't love me back

FUCK YOU BURN IN HELL YOU WORTHLESS LITTLE WHORE OF A CUMDUMPSTER SACK OF SHIT FUCKING ASS PATHETIC SLUT CUNT PUSSY UGLY MOTHERFUCKER Bitch

Sword and shield of your name, Broken record, we'll never part debt repaid with sharks interest, by attacking your gifted heart by attacking your gifted heart by attacking your gifted heart by attacking my tiny heart Heart attack, heart attack Heart attack, heart attack I had a fulltime temporary abuser You had a chance to court a musical loser Have your CDG shoes and grandmothers diamond ring You have four-forty of my dollars, score for SAT You asked me to love you long as I can An actor without character or fans Addicted to friend's Lorazepam, Lizdexamphetamine Square holepunch dimensions, a few eternities of me Heart attack, heart attack Heart attack, heart attack Hundred miles every weekend just to see me pissed off Tell me "next time don't stop 'til you cut your wrist off" Day your cardiac's detained, day I finally grin As you're forgotten by all, except your CollegeBoard login Heart attack, heart attack Heart attack, heart attack Every party throw up blacking out in front of others Speaking down on your only friend excluding your mother there should be a "Report User" system in real life You act apathetic, you're just a pathetic, uh, I don't know Heart attack, heart attack Heart attack, heart attack You fucked me, so fuck you bang a with off end the starting party year's new Hoard the bottles of liquid courage, for our anxiety While I loosen up, she'll keep her sobriety Surprised that the girl from my high school came Didn't recognize her at first, doesn't look the same Awkward and quiet, smiles so gay Only opened to agree with everything I say Want to go to my car? She answered with my own question Right in front of the house, parked in the closest section having a hard time, forced to make a correction in a last ditch effort I take off my protection Heart attack, heart attack Heart attack, heart attack a soft duet of airy free verse singing she ignores her phone's incessant on and off ringing Seeing steamy windows, someone checks the car's condition Runs away wailing, haunted by an apparition

want to grasp someone something close self conscious think people laughing wth me self conscious think people laughing at me I look stupid I like this self exposing can't talk really well self conscious laugh at myself feel a little lonely when I laugh I think people laughing with me then not, when the laughs do happen feel I laugh too long miss you guys thought about what you guys doing get lomely started off great 9:48 feeling more bad than good lonely, midnight would pay anything to have you with sad missing you sleep 115 everything my nails makes me thing 148 I'm good if I don't think about anything 204 almost got sad thought of if I went to the concert 216 I need god I don't think people notice what I'm going thru 407 lots of avoiding thinking 441 watching dream Corp LLC feeling fine I need to be happy with myself and I can be

You're everything to me, I can't live without you can't stand when you're gone, always want to be round you Everything around me makes me think about you I should have never let go of you, soon as I found you Your song's my only song, just want smiles from you I wish to be friends, my wishes won't come true Want you to want me to want you like I want you Don't you get that I lo

Crying the hardest I have cried in my life By far the single best night in my life What did I do to deserve this Finally feeling life's purpose Crying the hardest I have cried in my life Let me go back to that night in my life What did I do to deserve this So fucking pathetic and worthless Immobilized, ensnared by moments faded Unable to return, your scent has dissipated Never saw a reason to get rid of the pyre Thankful for our former flame, now burned by the fire I just get so cold and I get so tired I should feel a bit frigid in this pitch black snowstorm but your itchy black jacket keeps my body so warm tiny seashells play your voice volume ten on repeat static and moving pictures that I neglected to delete doodles and letters made for me takes away the terror Escaping the blizzard by putting on your apparel Returning back to the peak of our lifetime Shielding me from harm, your ring as my lifeline My own mother left before I was born, try faking your own birth. When I die it's going to be in the papers, for whatever that's worth. what do I need to die for I'm already a skeleton my ghost girl haunts me We're in the flashback right now, all the things that could have been, taunt me robots don't need heat the ghost is blawd you there's a draoon behno your sweet manmee is the swo outside of time eternally no one can lie to us anymore seven different types of your warmth Heat in the cold beats the cool in the warm And I am made of sunshine and golden light And I will feel this way forever And I will feel this way always And I will feel this way forever... again